Trudging Forward

Here I am, still in my mess. Although, now I better understand how to get myself back up on my feet. Did I have to start over? Yes. I am making better choices for my future and I feel good about that. I do still have a weight on my sholders in which I alone have to bare even though I wasn't the only one it was meant for...but that's the story of my life. Things are starting to look up for me. It's like the "light at the end of the tunnel" feeling. I just keep trudging forward.

And so it begins...

My life has spiraled out of control and I have found myself face down in the mess I have created. I have become a person I hate! I am disgusted with my actions lately! How do you forgive yourself for doing something you would consider unforgivable if done to you? I have been asking myself... how do I get out? How do I leave every unwanted memory, every bad experience behind, just walk away from the person I have become and still be me?...

The truth is... I can't. Everything I have done will stay with me forever!

So now what? Start from the beginning? Recreate myself?

Where do I begin?